Magic Valley NLP

Presupposition: Energy Flows Where Attention Goes

Events are real, however names have been changed. 

As a special education teacher I almost always have a delightful student with  Down syndrome in my classroom.  Down syndrome, also called Trisomy 21 because of an extra 21^st chromosome, causes developmental delays and particular characteristics such as short stature, flattened face, and almond-shaped eyes.  Named after physician John Langdon Down who was the first to identify it, Down syndrome occurs randomly and naturally in one of every 800 births of every race and economic group.   The chance of having a baby with Down syndrome increases with the age of the mother.  If the mother is 36 the chance is 1 in 300.  If she is 49 the chance is 1 in 12

Four  million pregnant women in the

will be offered first-trimester prenatal testing for Down syndrome in 2008.  Statistics show that 90% of those women whose unborn babies are diagnosed with Down syndrome will choose to terminate their pregnancy. Medical professionals do a great job educating parents about what might go wrong if they bring a child with Down syndrome into their family, but do  they give any information on what might go right?

Kathryn Lynard Soper wrote a beautiful book titled, Gifts: Mothers Reflect on How Children with Down Syndrome Enrich Their Lives (Woodbine House, 2007).  In an article she wrote for Meridian Magazine she passes us this story.

     “I was signing copies of Gifts at a bookstore event last June when a tall, brunette middle-aged woman approached the table. She peered at me and the stack of books at my elbow with curiosity.

“Do you have any friends or family members with Down syndrome?” I asked.

“No,” she said. “I’ve been lucky.”

It took me a few long seconds to recover from that remark. I don’t remember what I said in reply, but I took care to keep my voice friendly. Surely she wasn’t intending to be insensitive. And after all, until my son Thomas was born — and for several months afterward — I shared her sentiment: We’re lucky if we never have to deal with Down syndrome.

I don’t believe that anymore.

Thomas is about to turn two. He’s taking his first steps and speaking his first words. The fact that he has Down syndrome does not in any way lessen the delight of his childhood. If anything, our family’s pleasure in his company is heightened by his diagnosis, thanks to the many ways his presence has opened our minds and hearts. We are the ones who are lucky.”  (Meridian Magazine, Friday October 12, 2007)

Her insight led me to thinking.  So often we focus on the bad and forget the good things that go with it.  A favorite saying of NLP practitioners comes from the ancient wisdom of the Hawaiian Kahuna’s, “Energy flows were attention goes.”  What if we focused our energy on the positive aspects of children with Down syndrome? What would happen?  Our attention would be diverted to the good these children do. We would overlook the disabilities and discover rich abilities such as warmth, affection, openness, honesty and acceptance of self and others. Would we even pity those who were not able to have one of these children in their family? 

As a special education teacher I often pity those who do not have the opportunity of having these delightful students blessing their classroom environment. I laugh when a teacher or administrator having a bad day wanders in hoping for a hug, but not daring to ask.  I am the lucky one.  My students might not ever make great academic discoveries or put a man on Mars. But they will daily enrich the lives of others with their unique strengths and capacities.  

The high abortion rate for Down syndrome makes me wonder: In our quest for physical perfection,  have we put our energy in the wrong place.  As a society are we denying ourselves abundant opportunities for growth by refusing to welcome individuals with Down syndrome into our families and communities.  It is something to think about.

© by Debrah Roundy 2008

Picture used with permission.

Kathryn Lynard Soper was contacted and reviewed article.  I trust I have meet her specifications.